Category Archives: humor

city cab crash


i was just about to step off the curb to cross 61st street on first avenue today when i noticed a cab trying to manifest a middle lane in between two cars.  he was not very successful.

5 taxi cab accident 1st & 61st

so this poor couple who were just driving along, minding their own business, now have a crashed up car because the cabbie thought he could save 2 seconds getting to where ever it was he was headed.

2 taxi cab accident 1st & 61stthe man who’s car was struck by the time-crazed cabbie got out to assess the situation. he asked the cabbie, in a much calmer tone than i may have had, to straighten his wheels and back up.  the cab driver put the car in reverse without straightening the wheels first, and proceeded to re- swipe the entire length of the passenger side of the car, much to the horror of the woman sitting inside.

1 taxi cab accident 1st & 61stjust when i thought it couldn’t get any worse, the cab moved forward again, going for side swipe #3.

the people who had been stopped at the red light on first avenue eventually got tired of waiting for the cab driver to figure out how to get out of the middle of the intersection and when the light turned green, they drove right up the avenue as if there wasn’t a giant accident in the middle of the road.

4 taxi cab accident 1st & 61st

and therein lies all the excitement i have for this tuesday.

keep calm & carry on . . . .

“Everyone ought to bear patiently the results of his own conduct.”
~ Phaedrus 

looking for a new job?


.

while browsing craigslist’s writing/editing jobs today,  i saw this
opportunity which i decided to pass on,  but thought i would
pass along . . . .

Online Dating Surrogate (Flatiron)

Successful entrepreneur needs discerning woman to handle online dating communications for him for roughly an hour per dayProcess:
1. Review profiles of women on 3 or 4 dating sites
2. Per criteria you will be provided, mark as “Favorite” all potential women to contact
3. You’ll let me know when to review Favorites periodically and I’ll delete those I’m not interested in
4. You’ll write to and exchange messages with the remaining Favorites and try to set dates

Work hours, location and salary:
> One hour or so per day – flat $100/wk
> You set the hours
> Work from anywhere you choose

Ideal candidate for this job is similar to dating candidates sought:
> Pretty, thin, educated female in her 20s or 30s (with great taste and strong writing ability)

If This Part-Time Job is For You:
> Email to craig0519nyc@hotmail.com your picture, resume and lengthy enough response to assess your writing ability
> Indicate why this job will be easy and fun for you and describe why you believe that you have great taste and a discerning eye

  • Compensation: $100/week for roughly 7 hours work


78Live so that when your children think of fairness, caring, and integrity, they think of you.
H. Jackson Brown, Jr. 

 

duane reade – new york city’s worst store – scene 1


i’m positive i’m not the only new yorker who is completely fed up with duane reade (the nyc drugstore which is found on every other corner in the city  -  see reviews).  last year duane reade was purchased by walgreens and it was the hope of all city peeps that the acquisition would improve the quality of service in the stores. nope.  didn’t happen.   still atrocious.  (when was the last time you heard thae word atrocious?  funny, isn’t it?  that’s just what popped into my head . . . . :) )  anyway, i have boycotted duane reade several times over the years but eventually end up going back because they are always so close by – no matter where i live.

my first boycott was after the time i purchased mascara at DR only to find it had no bristles on the brush when i opened it.  the duane reade store manager refused the return.  i wrote a letter to the ceo of duane reade and i never got a response.  like father, like son . . . i realized why many DR employees are the worst in america – because dad doesn’t care.

i have many, many more duane reade stories, but to keep it short, i’ll just relay part 1 of yesterday’s incident and write a second post on the second act of stupidity.

scene 1:  i went to the DR on my block with a prescription and this was the conversation with the pharmacy employee (pe):

me: hi, do you have this?

pe:  no. we have no customers for it, so we don’t keep it in stock.

me: i have this rx every single month and every time i come here, you tell me you have no customers for this drug.  do you think you could keep it on hand so that i don’t have to call other pharmacies each month to find one that has this on hand?

pe: no.  we can’t stock that drug because we don’t get orders for it.  we can only order what we’ve sold the month before.

me:  how could you possibly sell something you don’t have, in order to get it into the system to generate the sale for next months re-order?

pe:  blank stare.  no response.  nada.

after about 30 seconds of staring eyeball to eyeball in complete silence, i turned around and headed home to make the litany of phone calls in search of my rx and wonder why she has a job and i’m unemployed.

Dad

“Everyone is entitled to be stupid, but some abuse the privilege.”
Anonymous

street vendors


the other day i passed by a street vendor selling decorative signage on 5th avenue.  this was by far my favorite sign:

smile   

i was a bit tempted . . . 

:)

“You can turn painful situations around through laughter. If you can find humor in anything, even poverty, you can survive it.”
 ~ Bill Cosby 

 

they always know what i’m thinking


everyday the story of the day arrives in my inbox and makes me smile.  love those story peeps. . . .

creating reality framed

“Genius. It is just attention to something specific. That’s all it is.”
~ Esther Hicks