being alone with the flu is no fun. walking around the block with ivan and a fever of 100.2 and a smashing headache is not a good time either.
i called several friends just to make sure someone was around to feed ivan just incase i had to hospitalize myself. being that it was the nicest weather one could ever hope for in november, i found no one home. thoughts of what would happen to ivan if i had to go to the hospital overwhelmed me. i had visions of ivan attacking the paramedics as they attempted to take me away. i knew the stretcher would never fit into my apartment and so i would have to be hauled out in one of those orange chairs on wheels.
things you can normally tolerate become unbearable when you’re sick. like the fire alrarm ‘low battery’ high pitched signal in the adjoining building. how can the people who live in that building stand it? i’m in the building next door and if i could get near it i would smash it with my mop, fever and all, i would smash that alarm. this made me hate all of the people in the adjacent building. i wondered if anybody’s head had actually exploded in real life.
the heat was so hot & dry that ivan woke me up in the middle of the night panting – hovering over my face, panting. once he woke me i realized that my throat was on fire and my mouth had turned into cement. i had to get out of bed to turn on the air conditioner. this made me hate the landlord.
2 days into my swine flu – yes, i’m sure it was swine – i was able to make human contact with my ex-neighbors, james and lauren. they had stayed in the city this weekend and would be around to help. i needed help. just a little while later they were on their way over with chicken soup, italian ice and oj. love them. the broken buzzer forced me to walk barefoot in the hallway, unshowered to open the door and let them in. this makes me hate my landlord even more.
4 days later i have almost recovered from my flu and still working on the residual trauma of my thoughts.
“Eat right, exercise regularly, die anyway”