the smoker

i’m a little bit obsessed with the woman across the street.  every 15 -20 minutes she comes out from her 2nd floor apartment, stands on the sidewalk and smokes a cigarette.  yes, that is right – every 15 – 20 minutes!  just as alarming is that she wears the same outfit every single day.  black sweat pants which are approximately 2″ too short and a black t-shirt.  everyday, every 15 minutes.  recently she got a new outfit.  this was so shocking after 3 years of observing her, i had to call my ex-neighbor, james, to fill him in on the news.  he was just as facinated by her as i am. we used to discuss her often while working outside in our adjoining yards during the summer time. the outfit wasn’t much of a stretch – ankle bone length black sweat pants – but these had a pink stripe down the side – and, a matching pink t-shirt! she wore her new outfit for 2 days and then went back to the original black on black.

‘the smoker’  appears to be somewhere in her forties and up until 8 or 9 months ago, was very, very over weight.  in an extremely short period of time she dropped at least 70 pounds.  she seems to have stabilized, although in my opinion, has approximately 45 pounds left to lose.  since i am obsessed with her behavior, not to mention her choice of clothing, i asked her one day how she managed to lose so much weight.  “eating right and exercise”, she said.  yeah, ok, i thought, you and star jones.

she works from home in her second floor apartment next door to the ronald mcdonald house.  i have no idea how what she does for work or how she fits it in between all the smoking, but i plan to find out someday.  she appears to be a pack rat too.  from the street i can see her kitchen.  plastic storage bins are piled up almost to the ceiling.  one would think that with all the unused closet and dresser drawer space she must have, there would be no need for storage bins.  i wonder what she keeps in them.


“There is no such thing as a weird human being, It’s just that some people require more understanding than others”
 – Tom Robbins